A long needed respite.

Alright peoples. 

The time has come. 

I'm taking a break. 

Right now it's planned for the month of Feb. 

I may post Friday fragments(if anything exciting happens) but otherwise I am going to abandon the pressure to preform. 

For some reason I really struggle with what to write. 

So while I am on my Bloggy Vacation, I'll be contemplating life, and enjoying life, all the while planning on what I want to do in Sept/ the rest of my life.

Dread-full

So I announced my desire to dread my head. It went over like a lead balloon. Go figure, I have old fashioned parents.   I enjoy my hair for the most part.. I have wanted dreads for a long time now. Every time I bring it up someone has a good argument against them so I put it off.  I really really want to do it. But I don't know who I can get to help me. I am thinking that I want to do dreaded braids, which are really tiny. Or maybe just really tiny  dreads (the size of my pinky) Or maybe I should just chop it all off. Make everyone happy.

Keep my newfie sister Madonna in your prayers. She went for surgery yesterday, and I am praying all went well.

Also I'm a working girl and so tired right now. My cat was determined to drive me crazy and I had the most restless night of sleep.
 

Friday Fragments-late edition

While talking about Corb's maps for his world. The subject of terrorist and how to wipe out a lot people quickly came up without ruining the city. But I didn't realize that he was talking about it relating to his book. I commented the part that scares me is that he would spend time thinking the subject out. He laughed and said as a writer "I was thinking backwards about it and how it would leave a city a ghost town. Then he said "I am not rich enough to be a terrorist, you know they need lots of moolah" at which point I lost it, and couldn't stop laughing at him. Turns out the idea we had been discussing wasn't his originally.  Yes, we talk about strange things, but that's why I enjoy him :)
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  I was making cookies with Birdy and Penny (well Penny did all the work and I was stealing batter) I wanted to grab one last scoop before going to get the adult ingredients for these (CMB) 
I looked at Birdy and whispered "Close your eyes"(b/c Penny had just scolded her for eating cookie batter)
 Birdy turns her face towards me with a look of WTF? and whispers right back to me "NO"
I was laughed and went to put my shoes on. I got p-owned by a two year old.

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you know your tired when... you get your bra done up and realize it's inside out. and you managed to do the hooks up like it was nothing and it takes more time for you get to them undone.
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I  have great friends when they can convince me to drag my sorry butt outta bed after 5 hours of sleep. and I throw on my grubbies and rush out on ice slicked roads for some conversation and knitting. Expect I worried them and went to work out first :)
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this week has been very harsh for me. I haven't sleep more then 4 hours in a single night(expect wed, and that was about 6) So my mental state is crumbling quickly. So going to buy some sleep aids. Melatonin is not cutting it for me. I ever always thought my world always looks okay if I am well rested and eating balanced meals. If not, the ADD child in me comes out and wreaks havoc on everyone around. It's not pretty.
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Like my new header? I am slowly painfully learning html. I tried to load my own blog and it took so long, I was appalled. How does everyone find the loading time?
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Does anyone else miss Mrs.Wilson? (it's been since Nov) I didn't realize how long until this morning, since I normally cheat and read my blogs in Google Reader.
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I wish some people like Miss M and Eternity could blog......  I set up email updated for Ms.Eternity so she should be able to email post to her blog. (in China blogger and FB are blocked. Damn Government Censoring)
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I hate our internet. it's Xplornet. I feel I have full rights to complain about this, after helping whiny bitchy ungrateful Ccast customers. They can get 50 MB speeds for 149.00 a FLIPPING MONTH. Do you know how much I would have to pay to get anything about 1 mb?!! 140.00. SO NOT FAIR. I am ranting because my other choice is dial up or Telus (bend over and take it) Wifi which is worse speed wise as Xplornet. (we had it when my daddy took me to Ottawa. ANYWAYS. Just a little bit of sore subject right now.

I wasted 75 mins of my life.  But I talked with a very nice man, who has been using computers since 1970. He educated me on netstat -a and -b which i I would recommend running on your cmd prompt screen and finding out what open ports are running. He recommended it be less then 15. Our vista compys had 30, and mine had 20(xp) The cause: ITUNES. (I'm becoming a mac hater, another story, another time.) BTW there is only 4 computers in the house :p.... 2 of which are running a lot. But remember there is at least 12 ppl in this house and most times if not more.
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I had the worst boob shopping experience recently. The only thing that rectified the situation was when the sales woman asked me "Do they need under-wires?" She was very apologetic and slightly mortified. But hey when you are a huge as me, They are the Girls. I can't change it with out surgery, or a heck of a lot of weight loss.
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Which brings me to Curves. Not really a fan, but my sister gave me a 30 day  free work out. So not going to turn down free gym time :) so my butt and back thigh muscles (whats the name of them again?) are sore. Only took me of working out everyday. I like to hurt the next day and sweat during a work out. So I find I have to push myself really hard. But that's difficult when walking up the stairs leaves you breathless from lack of sleep and protein.
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I was looking forward to a free snowboarding day. They closed the hill. 
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I've decided the only way I can afford to help in Haiti right now is to pray and visit Ree's site!
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Did I post about American Eagle pants? Anyways I measured my waist.. Which seems to have grown (but not enough) I sized myself to 12. Which arrived on Christmas eve. They are at least 2 inches too big. But the good news the sales are getting better on the sight. Plus 5 mins after listing the pants on a local FB group a girl wanted them and they fit her!!
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I made two pairs of slippers and am working on a third pair which started out for Levi and now are for Amariah. (my gauge is way too small for the third pair)









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Trim... I'm way more photogenic with my eyes closed.

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I'm finally running out of random things. I know there was lots of funny things that happened but I didn't write them down. Bad Journalist.

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I've left FB. I am so frustrated with it. Edit: for a whole 6 hours and then forgot that about it and logged back in.

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I am listening to CBC podcasts a lot lately and Focus on the family, some of them just break my heart.

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TTFN -- Tigger

Broken Hearted

Only the other night I prayed, Father break my heart with the things that break your heart.

I opened this link Photos of Haiti *past 48 hours* and the tears just streamed down my face, my heart feeling like I was being delivered news of my own families deaths. The only way I can explain the grief is that my prayer was answered.

I want to send help. I'm thinking of possibly raising money for World Vision or another organization, I found this link on CNN  What you can do.

I am going to read through this later and post more about what I choose.

What should I be in when I grow up?!
 This question is haunting me.
 There are so many fields of study that interest me.

 I have training in comparative live blood, and I am certified.
I've done three online courses through the www.aliveacademy.com, (Natural health, Anatomy, Herbs for healing) I've interested in helping people but I want a balanced approach. I want to do something that I can take world wide. So I won't be tied down to one city/state/nation. I want to be somebody and do something with my life.

The new year always brings out the list maker in me.

What do I want to do this year, where do I want to be, how can I get there? All of this plus the new developments in my love life (not positive ones) make me reevaluate what the heck I am doing with my life. I'm 27 years old. I have no career, no family (*of my own) and more debt then I am willing to admit to openly.

I am a need to stay busy person.
This drives me to read, and to be crafty. It's probably the driving force behind me wanting to go back to school soon.
 I have this time line growing in my mind, and it includes getting a job soon (temp one) going to Camp Sagitwata for the summer, and doing some online courses in September and working part time (Partylite or testing blood maybe)
 Paying off my debt and losing 20 lbs in the process.
 BUT HOW DO I MAKE THIS HAPPEN?!
The first thing that I found was a pdf for goals, and the second was a budget sheet. Now if I could just find some motivation, money and will power :)
 Some days I wish we could be like the movie characters that just plug into their chairs and get data and lessons  uploaded directly to their brains. I could be a marital artist and a English major and be some sort of Doctor already.

stories

I've tales to tell, and photos/videos to show. Some day I may even get around to sharing them with you. My hearts just not in it today.