Tuesday, December 29

Jesus is the reason for the season

It's been a green Christmas for me. Which fits just fine, seeing as so far I've managed to control myself and not say BAH HUMBUG.
 This merry season has really come up quickly for me. Something to do with life turning it self up upside down a few times. 
 We had a lovely breakfast that I slept through, and then a yummy lunch and dinner happened on Boxing Day. We had a neighbor family over and Mel's twin friends arrived from Progress. It was a loud and rowdy night filled with good food, friends and lots of laughs.
 Below are photos of the feasting, and game playing, the entertainment (Birdy spinning), The Nativity Cake,

Birdy opening a gift from friends, and a table full of cookies and chocolates from grandma!

Tuesday, December 22

point taken.

  • I won the battle of clean clothes vs my bed, and now they are all put away until I do laundry again.
  • My bed is stripped and waiting for me to my iron. I am going to attempt to block a scarf. I am afraid.
  • I missed the chance to vote on the last 4 ep of Survivor for our fantasy game, and I'm not gonna like I am very upset. I had no idea the voting would close Sunday evening.. Stupid No Cable.. 
  • This flu is making crotch-y and old feeling.. Like I'm an old soul aching in the this young body, I just want to be better now. Thank you Very Much
  • I have no Christmas Spirit, and the worst part is I can't even drink Eggnog or make cookies right now, because I don't want to give this lovely flu to anyone else.
  • My External HD is alive again, I think that my day, cause then I can keep obsessively watching Lie to me/Bones/Criminal Minds.
  • I stole my mattress back, and I might get a decent night's sleep, Finally!
  • Have you ever looked deep inside yourself and found too much repressed anger... I did... Mine is starting to hit the boiling point. But I think that's another topic for another blog.
  •  I think that enough random ness for one day.

Sunday, December 20

back from deaths door

Okay so I'm being melodramatic but I was so freaking sick with this awful chest/head cold for the past two days I've done nothing but sleep and read and watch movies. Every joint was aching, I had a fever, I just want to sleep, but then I wasn't tired. So now I'm left with the I'm hacking up an internal organ cough, and I'm done with being sick 'tude. Maybe now my rooms will get clean. (that was my plan for this weekend before I got hijacked)

I've been in the worst of moods, so I didn't feel like blogging because everything I could think of was a complaint.
 So I am going to do mini book reviews.
Vanishing Acts--- Very well written, slightly disturbing content, not for children. About a child who finds out she was kidnapped by her father.
When the Crickets cry --- Unique writing style that leaves lots to the imagination in a good way, about a little girl who needs a heart transplant and the community who loves her dearly.
Angels in Pink --- Classic make me cry story, about teenagers who help at a hospital.
The wal-mart effect - Very good look at the cost of walmart, the good and the bad. Easy and enjoyable to read.

On my to read list
Take One -Karen Kingsbury
Why Mexican's don't drink Molson
The Myth of Ability
The Lovers Knot
Perelandra - C.S.Lewis
Smart Cookie making more dough.

Edit:  My brother is laughing at me for being such a nerd and reading so much.

Monday, December 14

The keeper of my heart

Just got older!
happy mouse
Happy Birthday Dad


I am struggling to get my outside door open, it's midnight. The stairs to my room are against my parents bedroom wall. I am carrying to packages and a limp plate of dessert. The heavier burden slips out of my fingers, and out tumbles two books, my knitting and my 1 terabyte external HD Aka Externalness. It all makes a larger clattering noise and I add Oh Sh*t to the clamor. Only two thoughts go through my head, "So sorry mom and dad, and NO my last HD died rolling around the backseat of my car with the printer, not this one too."
 After picking collecting the contents of my bag, I realize the stand for the HD is missing. Then I walk into find all the chicken I fed the cat last night didn't sit well with him.
  I attempt to turn on my computer just to have it shut off twice after about 2 seconds. I manage to un-stick the button, and test out my hard drive. Which works!!  
  I went to take my dessert to the fridge then I walked into the attic ladder which never got put back after they extracted the decorations.

It was a long 10 minutes. Which thankfully is all over!

Monday, November 30

60 days ago I kissed my husband good bye and he departed from my life. This was a mutual choice.  I then proceed to pack up everything I had in St. John's and mail it back home (BC), after 30 days I packed up my cat and myself and we hopped on a plane.
12 hours and 3 transfers later we landed in P.G. both alive and intact. I then drove 8 hours and arrived home on Halloween. Sadly I was too tired to go out and enjoy the car rally or tricker treating. Since then I've been babysitting Birdy and knitting up a storm, hanging with my posse, sleeping, and generally wreaking havoc on my room and the laundry room.
  It hasn't all been easy or fun. Some days I wish I would've stayed in NF. Other days I really don't care about anything. The latter is the most recent feelings.

The comments are closed because this isn't a pity post, more of a "Y'all my friends (support group) I want you to know what's happening" post. Plus I really don't like discussing the details constantly and I'm afraid it makes me morose the more I think about it.
  To answer one final question we aren't divorced, just separated and focusing on ourselves right now. It's the best choice for all concerned.

Thank you guys for sticking with me here in this literary window into my personal soap opera.

Wednesday, November 25

Knitting related

Smellyann received my first ever awkward blanket and she posted a photo

Last night I went to the Wild N Wooly's meeting.. A bunch of ladies knitting at Cafenara and I came home smelling like a burnt coffee bean. It was nice to meet over ladies, we laughed a lot and I finished my second slipper which sadly looks scary compared to the first. Lots of little mistakes. Plus it's one size smaller. I am a smrt. I might start on some piggy slippers for Birdy or one the multiple babies coming. But I hate the pattern because it's very poorly written.
I just need to wash and block my baby hood and then sew it together. I'm thinking I should get a few projects knitted up and then sew them all together on one night.

I learned how to make a granny square! Bonnie taught me on Sunday while watching One Tree Hill with Tams. We have Saturday night planned for knitting (Sunday was Crocheting) and another marathon on 1TH.

The last few Saturdays have been pretty busy so the kids haven't had many more lessons yet, but Levi is progressing nicely on a orange and gray checkerboard scarf. Trish was making a washcloth and she had gotten quite a bit done. So hopefully we will be able to sit down this weekend.

Also the lovely Rudee from A Knitting Nurse is going through her stash and mailing us some needles and yarn so the kids can have their own needles. We are all very excited about this, plus it seems to inspiring her pull out all her unfinished projects :D

I made a list of things to do today, and so far Blog is the only that I've done. But then again I've only been mobile for five hours.

Wednesday, November 11

Grill Girl

Working in reverse my day:
  • Dumping water on the flint that Alicia dropped while trying to get it outside, did I mention that it was red hot and now there are black marks on the hard wood flooring?
  • My parents have this lovely, shiny new bar-b-q, and it took a good hour to cook burgers on, I got frustrated and threw them all in a frying pan. But first I had to get all geared up cook on the front porch, that included a toque, hoodie, over coat (belonging to someone else) winter boots and finger mittens.
  • I opened up my loom, (that I purchased at a local auction for $30) and after some research found out that they are worth approx. $800 dollars brand new. Also it's missing the front set of heddles, so I won't be weaving anything up in the near future. 
  • I fixed Def Jam Vendetta and played a little bit on the PS2, and then helped the kids get to the bottom of why the dance pad wasn't working anymore. Sadly to find out there isn't any actual Dance Dance Revolution games on it.
  • The night before (until midnight) we had a knitting class on my bed. Which consisted of 5 siblings and 1 neighbor girl. I told them not to come in before 10 this morning, Who was I kidding, should've been 11. They learned how to knit, after polishing off some casting on techniques. They proceed to pester for the 2 sets of needles I had later that day. I knew I had more but they where hidden in the middle of a bed frame. Tonight Levi dug them out, so they will be happy to see them in the morning. After taking stock we have a shelf and a box full of yarn, and possibly more coming in the last half of my belongings. 
  • We've been playing Balderdash in the evenings (after finding a jr & sr editions in Prince Rupert last Thursday) The first time I played, someone either picked my word or I got points. It was awesome, second time after a little FB bragging, I didn't do so hot. 
  • Today I learned my Uncle served in the Navy, so today I am remembering him, and another uncle and a grandfather who fought for our freedom. 
  • I am on super slow internet, so uploading photos and browsing is very tedious. So to say the least I've been reading everything in Google reader.
  • This post is officially over because Daxter used his kitty liter (which is in the small half finished bathroom) and I am dying.

Friday, November 6

Friday Fragments

  •  Mrs.4444
  •  Hosts this lovely day, where you can put all your random things into a post! 
  • Happy Birthday to my little Birdy! She turned 2 yesterday, and we had a doggy theme party on Wednesday, I am still waiting on photos. I will post them later. 
  • I have worked out twice and hoping to make it a third time
  • A mechanic was removing a cylinder-head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was there waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike when the mechanic shouted across the Garage, 'Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?' The cardiologist, a bit surprised,
    walked over to where the mechanic was working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, 'So Doc , look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, repair any damage, and then put them back in, and when I finish, it works just like new.
    So how come I make $39,675 a year and you get the really big bucks ($1,695,759) when you and I are doing basically the same work?' The cardiologist paused, smiled and leaned
    over, then whispered to the mechanic...
    "Try doing it with the engine running"
    • It's rained cats and dogs since I've arrived home, I do miss that about St.John's, we rarely ever had rain. It would mist once in a while. 

Monday, November 2


I awoke to the sound of a chain saw. Only in the boonies!
I skipped out on church and slept in, it was quite lovely after my long day. Woke up at 10:30am (Friday) Helped move Ms.M to her Mom's and they dropped me off at the airport at 2:30 am, and then I got checked in around 3:30 and boarded the plane at 5am. I slept for about two hours, and hour on each flight. I Arrived in P.G. at noon, (which was 4:30pm according to my body clock) We went for lunch and came back out and the cat wasn't in his harness. I have no idea how he got out of it, but I was starting to panick and there he was inside of my suitcase!
I let him ride in the vehicle for the last two hours and he wanted to sit on the dash, and it was quite funny.
We pulled in around 9pm and I was so tired. The kids finally got home after 10 pm, and my body was like hello!! it's 2:30am, go to bed.
I visited with two different friends from my old work, and the popped into see my little birdy.
I can't wait to go visit the new natural good store in town.

Monday, October 26


Back to one the greatest places on earth Terrace

Details to follow..

Tomorrow I have a dentist appt, then a eye appt, then to the doctors to get some paperwork filled out. HOPEFULLY

Monday, October 19


The thoughts and words are boiling over in my head, and the heat of the stove is making my skin too warm, or perhaps it's this ugly black fleece robe. One to which I've attached my hatred.
  But for now I shall pen a few thoughts, so my mind is clear and I can continue to stash stuff in boxes with no rhyme nor reason. I hate moving, I hate starting over. I hate change unless it's well thought out. How can one pack properly? Part of me says well you should drag everything out of every corner, and do not mix bedroom things with kitchen things, and my good sense kicks in and says, you aren't rich and don't want all your earthly possessions destroyed by the evil Canada Post workers who hate their jobs.

 I had one of those days at work where you think, I don't know why I hate my job so much.. I was surprised when 6:30 rolled around.
 I found out today that I have approximately 7 weeks left of illness claim and I can open a new claim after I hit BC until I find a new job.
 Oh Jobs.. I don't even want to think about that. I want to study and work and be everything to everybody.

Am I meandering yet? Think of this as a Friday Fragment or something like that :)

On the knitting front, I have started a baby's bonnet from the 1844's. It may turn into a gift for my bestie's little girl who is a month away, or my little birdy's doll. The sad news is I had to rip out the first 6 rows and start over again.
 Ohhh I hate failure. I finished my care package blanket. but there is a dropped stitched. Oh, that gives me an idea? Mel, can I send it to you unfinished? I promise to be sending you your long overdue candles with it.

I could kick myself for having so much yarn to pack up and ship, because of all the weeks I had off, I could've whipped it into something productive at least.

The weather here has been East Coastish.. Mean and Stormy, days that make so happy for Terrace/West coast weather. People who complain about the weather in Terrace ain't seen nothing. They need to spend a full year out here, and from what I've heard this year is going to be a killer one for snow and I am slightly sad to miss that.

 But there is not a snowball's chance in hell that I am going to miss the freezing temperatures.

I have been compiling a list of my favorite newfie sayings, because as soon as I get home I will forget'em all. Like I tinks so, and best kind b'y.

No proofreading done.

Saturday, October 17

What a change in weather overnight. Last night we had winds up to 96km, blowing rain/wet snow around. It was actually scary to walk home from work last night because of the wind blowing the trees around. I was having a hard time walking in a straight line, and was being blown backwards, and it was very difficult to walk. It sounded like airplanes taking off all through the night, but it was just the wind. 
 This morning dawn clear & sunny with some very cold wind. But not nearly as strong. I sure hope it's like this tomorrow morning when I have to catch a bus to the dentist in the morning. 
I am so tired of working 5 days in a row, this job is so mentally exhausting. 

Tuesday, October 6

Jewels of Music

This is a song that I listened to while meandering home, and it sums up my feelings right now

I shiver, shut the door
Can't think standing here no more
I'm alone, my mine's racing, heart breaking
Can you be everything I need you to be?
Can you protect me like a daughter?
Can you love me like a father?
Can you drink me like water?
Say I'm like the desert, just hotter.

The point of it all
Is that if I should fall
Still you're name I'll call

It's gonna be all right, no matter what they say
It's gonna be a good day, just wait and see
It's gonna be okay, cause I'm okay with me

As long as we laugh out loud
Laugh like we're mad
Cause this crazy, mixed up beauty is all that we have
Because what's love but an itch we can't scratch, a joke we can't catch
But still we laugh

This is a new song, which is speaks of the hope I had 2.5 years ago:

Honestly there is a story under it all. But where do I start?
I've always had a passion for acoustic girl music, and Jewel is my favorite. Miss Mouse introduced me to her, and I think I feel in love with the song I'm Sensitive, and the love affair has just grown from there. I have said that some of her first songs would make better poetry.

A lyric that grabbed my attention was from Kiss the flame, I loved this line

But wherefore art thou Romeo
where have all the brave men gone
Show me one man who know his own heart
To him I shall belong

 It really summed up what I was looking for in a man, and honestly it was really hard to find a guy who knows what he wants.

 I had met this man and then he had fled from my life, then one day while at work, said man opened up a convo on msn with something about my msn status which was "Show me one man who know his own heart, To him I shall belong" and how he knew what he wanted. I was already hook line and sinker but that sealed the deal. I think we started dating a short time after that.

Later he drove my car 16 hours so that when I flew in from Mexico, I could have options (go home, stay with him) He admitted to listening to the music stored in my deck and enjoying it, and wondering if they were secret messages for him.Wondering if I loved him (no word of a lie, although he may deny it now)
He is the romantic one. 

I think I could write a timeline of our relationship in Jewel songs, but I won't bore you.

So this brings me full circle back to the song at the top. I am going to be okay, I love him, and life just keep happening around me and I would rather get to my destination then be caught in a riptide. 

That Man? Is my Mr.Darcy

Monday, October 5

Major Crossroads

The song really describes my life right now. I've made my decision, and I now have peace about it. I know this is very elusive, but I am struggling with transparency and how much to share, to choose my words wisely to guard certain people. To make the wisest choice, to not air my dirty laundry as some would say.
How much detail is necessary for the world to know? Only what will help them. What in my situation will help you? The play by play or the his-story of it and glory of my Comforter in walking me through my valleys filled with shadows.

I've realized I am like a child who has too many new toys. I become quickly overwhelmed with my "dreams" list, "to-do" lists, and "every day" lists. So I don't do anything. Mr. Darcy made a very wise and valid point for me last night. I was worrying about where I should be serving, and what if I am in the wrong place, and I was getting all caught up in the rabbit trails of my worry. This is what always makes me distracted to the point where I end up doing nothing normally.

His perspective was "Which situation or where would you be more empowered to be a better person? Where you can become more or better, is where God can and will use you more, so focus on who you are or are becoming rather than WHERE you are."

I am so thankful for him.
Edit: thanks for the heads up Rudee (hopefully the video will work now)

Saturday, October 3

Tomato on toothpicks

Mr. J, Ms. M & I are in a competition to see who can lose the most weight in 30 days. So far I have gained 4 lbs. It's depressing. At this point I'm ready to weigh in only once a week. J & I went for a walk on Friday and decided to put a little wager on it, and on Monday M decided to join in, so we restarted as of the 14th of Sept.
It's great because it's making me want to work out, I've been running and doing yoga on the wii, and feeling thinner.

In other news Value Village had a 50% off sale, and I found two pairs a jeans and a cape. The first pair are high waist-ed and fit me like a charm, the second pair are skinny jeans, and would fit better if I lost 4 inches an inch or two.

I am thinking Little Miss Orange Riding hood for Halloween.
What do you think?

PS: Mr. Darcy & I are wearing the same pant's if that wasn't obvious already to you smart people!

Thursday, September 24

Swinging in the park

Yesterday while trying to do a 2 person run on the Wii with Ms. M, Bad boots announced he wanted to go to the PARK. We went two nights ago and had a blast until older kids came along and took over the equipment.
 So after completing my ten mins on Super Hula hoop, We gathered the necessity's and started walking, it was +20 out, but extremely windy.
  As I pushed the stroller up the hills, my calves started to complain, and I veto the idea of going further up the hill to find the other park.
  We had the entire playground to ourselves for a good 30 mins, and then an adorable little girl with her grandparents came to swing with us.  After they left at least 6 kids showed up, and poor little Bad boots was feeling pretty shy, so we went for a walk around the field.  Finally after wearing himself out and a little bribing we walked to the library, where he fell asleep as I was browsing for books.
 I was sad not to be able to find The last song by Nicholas Sparks, so I am going to have to request it online.

I am waiting for a phone call right now, to confirm that I am going back to work on Saturday, Finally!

Thursday, September 17

Fantasy Survivor

Go check it out!

Sad faces

 I walked to the post office today hoping to pick up my swap pack from CMHS, but it was my package being returned to me because it was unclaimed :(
 The post office worker thought I was a little dense and felt the need to explain since my address was in the upper left hand corner it's the return address. I was standing there thinking. WELL DUH. I put it there just in case this happened. 

In other frustrating news, I may not be returning to work for another two weeks. I think I may just go stir crazy. I have very mixed emotions about going back to work. 

The only upside is that's sunny out and Survivor starts tonight!

Photo: Sad Little Birdy -My Niece about 10 months old I think

Monday, September 14

Sunday, September 13

Boredom will kill me.

I had a 5 hour nap and now I am ready to do something. ANYTHING. But everyone else is watching movies or playing world of warcraft. Right now I wish I could travel by speed of light, and drop in at Eric's house and play star craft for hours with Adam & Ben and him. Just like we used. I miss those guys so much.
Photos from 04-05
  1. Chase, Adam, Me
  2. Adam, Me, Shelly,
  3. Ben
  4. Tim
  5. Eric
  6. Ben at Mr.Mikes
  7. Me & Jewel (my baby sister, who I miss too)